What People Are Saying About Penny

"I like to think of you as a high priced call girl that the unwashed masses can't afford--like Woody Allen's Whore of Mensa. It's not your fault that people offer $10 blowjobs on the street corner. It's not an insult if somebody doesn't buy your art." -Alexandra J Walters

"Once Penny was making her own silk thread, and a midget appeared. Before he could open his ugly mouth, without looking up, she exclaimed, 'Rumpelstiltskin. Now get the fuck out of here.' Fairytale Over."- Beth Featherstone

"Penny can push a needle through a telephone pole without a thimble." -Shane Blaufuss

"When a man asked Penny, 'What’s the meaning of life?' She looked at him for exactly 3 minutes, completely still, until he cried. That man’s name was Steve Jobs."- Beth Featherstone

"A demon from the pits of bitch cunt." -W.C. Hurst

"pulitzer for you too." -John Lurie

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Night Mare

Night Mare Diptych

Relief Print diptych, printed on Fabriano ingres. Edition of five, 6"x10"

Night Mare

About ten years ago, I knew an extraordinary woman. She and I would go out to rural Texas and watch meteor showers at two in the morning, and she would tell me stories about her childhood. She grew up in west Texas, and was raised by her grandparents. Her grandmother was a bruja, because she was born on Dia De Los Muertos, but she was a good witch. Her grandfather was a bad witch hunter. What a pair. She told me some of her earliest memories was throwing chickens into a fire. The chickens would burn and their spirits would fight in the air, and that's how you could tell who was a bad witch. She also said that her grandfather would tell her stories about witches in northern Mexico.

In all these stories, he was riding home from parties at a neighboring ranches on horseback. Apparently, if you see a woman in the desert at three in the morning, she's probably a bad witch, because no respectable woman would be wandering around alone that late. He would sneak up on them and whisper The Lord's Prayer, and knot a handkerchief as he recited it. This would bind up the witch until she couldn't move, and then he would then scold her, tell her to knock it off.

Late one night he was riding home, and saw a witch rustling around. He headed towards her, but every time he got close, she would outrun him, even at a full gallop. He chased her to the edge of a cliff, cornering her. Before he could confront her, she spun around and snapped her teeth at him. He said she had a horse's head.

This story has rolled around in my mind ever since.

for sale here-

Friday, June 19, 2009

The Wonderful World of YouTube

I caught a glimpse of a head line on Fox News the other day, something about how "YouTube isn't as family friendly as you might have thought."

I've never thought that. I was surprised that anyone would. But anyway, one of the most hilarious/baffling genres I've seen on the YouTube is something called "Air Sex". Or if you were to search for it, "Fantasy Boiz" "Up and Down Pretty Ricky." Now, Mr. Murder and I are HUGE fans of Bob Fosse (All That Jazz, Cabaret, Sweet Charity,) but I think even he would blush at this choreography.

So, our sweet friend Martin Huntlee, and my honey Johnny Murder wrote a song explaining the phenomenon, and remixed one of the Fantasy Boiz videos.


Also, Martin Huntlee Loves love, and sweet sweet songs about ice cream and castles and shapes. Hear him here.

Martin Auto Tuning the slow jam. (Photo for Amada Panda!)

Monday, June 15, 2009

Shame on me, credit where credit is due

I thought I was soooo clever when I started making these Embroidered Fortune Tellers...
Phat Quarter Anatomy Swap

Quilted Fortune Teller

Quilted Fortune Teller

Turns out I should have done a bit of Googling....
Embroidered Fortune Teller
Lynne Nicoletti

I really wish I had thought to search for these earlier to avoid any foot mouthing. Even though I didn't know about these before I made my own, I still feel kind of douchebagy for not immediately giving her a nod.

Granted, Lynne's appear to be cross stitched, and probably don't have dirty business Anaïs Nin quotes inside, buuuut, it does look like she "invented" them first, and I don't want to be an Shmurban Threats stealer.

With that said, I'm in the process of making more, and I should have them up in my Etsy this weekend. Current quotes contained are more Anaïs Nin, Ludacris lyrics, and other surprises!

Edit: Here is her official web site.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Jesus thinking in a tree, new piece by Bascom Hogue

(Click photo to see detail)

Jesus thinking in a tree
Originally uploaded by Bascom Hogue
I can't even comment on this, it's just stunning. Click the link to see more of his recent work.
Read his interview here.

Monday, June 1, 2009

Naughty Adventures in Fabric!

Ohhhhhhh. I just finished this, and I'm really pleased with how it came out. It's an erotic quilted fortune teller, containing quotes from Delta Of Venus by Anais Nin. The exterior is yellow wood grain cotton, with hand embroidered numbers, colors, and quotes... "Her hand held a whip with regal assurance," and "Do you want to see how we make love when we feel lazy?" Eight quotes in all. The lining is a beautiful yellow and blue printed damask.
I love that these are called "Fortune Tellers," try your luck, you naughty couples! I also love that they're called "Cootie Catchers." Uh-Oh.
I'll be making more, and this one is up in my Etsy shop.

Quilted Fortune Teller
Quilted Fortune Teller