What People Are Saying About Penny

"I like to think of you as a high priced call girl that the unwashed masses can't afford--like Woody Allen's Whore of Mensa. It's not your fault that people offer $10 blowjobs on the street corner. It's not an insult if somebody doesn't buy your art." -Alexandra J Walters

"Once Penny was making her own silk thread, and a midget appeared. Before he could open his ugly mouth, without looking up, she exclaimed, 'Rumpelstiltskin. Now get the fuck out of here.' Fairytale Over."- Beth Featherstone

"Penny can push a needle through a telephone pole without a thimble." -Shane Blaufuss

"When a man asked Penny, 'What’s the meaning of life?' She looked at him for exactly 3 minutes, completely still, until he cried. That man’s name was Steve Jobs."- Beth Featherstone

"A demon from the pits of bitch cunt." -W.C. Hurst

"pulitzer for you too." -John Lurie

Friday, March 6, 2009

Love and Thunder Stealing

Welcome To Hell

A few years ago, When Johnny Murder and I began mutually stalking each other full time, he came into my bar and gave me this comic he had drawn. He called it "erotic art."

I knew then that I would not let him leave after our third date, and we've been together ever since.

Unfortunately, Johnny's a complicated man. He has Tourette's, stupid back injuries, and super bad cabin fever.

I am a hermit. I'm constantly looking for new reasons not to have to leave the house, particularity with total cultural collapse right around the corner.

So I told Johnny, "You need a bed hobby. Why don't you embroider your comics?"
And a star was born. A thunder stealing star.
2746344690_2d46401fca_o
Yep. That says "Piss Popsicle".

So now, not only is Mr. Murder famous for his band and his band and his bands, (available on iTunes!), now he gets phone calls from people in Australia and the U.K. asking about interviewing him for their subversive crafting pieces.
It makes me feel like this.
werner-herzog-and-klaus-kinski

I just have to remember to channel my rage and sour grapes into my own projects.
Commemerative




Anyone else living with Talent Hoggers?

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